Could there be a possible solution to this?
Recently, while I was picking up my groceries, I stumbled upon a rather startling incident.
In the store was a young man, presumably in his early to mid-twenties.
Just like me, he was engrossed in his own shopping. Absorbed in his task, he inadvertently crashed into a young woman. The two of them bumped heads but thankfully, no one was seriously injured.
At first, I didn’t pay much heed to the incident as such accidental collisions can occur every now and then.
What transpired next left me dumbfounded.
The young man extended an apology for the mishap, with the decorum expected from a well-bred individual.
However, the woman’s reaction was full of wrath. She hurled derogatory words at the young lad unflinchingly.
She boldly called him a fool, an ignoramus, a complete waste of space…
These were her exact sentiments.
The lad bore it all, his head bowed, on the brink of tears.
He didn’t utter a single reply. He didn’t assert himself.
I was at a loss for words.
Here was a young man, receiving a public dressing-down from a woman, responding as though he was an abused, humiliated animal.
And I say this not implying he should have retaliated against the woman, that is not my intention.
What I am emphasizing is that he didn’t stand his ground. He merely stood idle.
Because, after all, such incidents occur. It was nobody’s fault. Why did he allow himself to be subjected to such indignity in a public place like the store?
The conclusion is indisputable.
He embodies a man of diminished strength.
His failure to assert himself stemmed from fear.
Increasingly, this pattern is glaringly evident in our societal landscape.
Modern-day males exhibit a lack of vigor. Among all the generations thus far, they appear to be the most fragile.
This observation inevitably prompts a query.
What leads to the perceived fragility of contemporary men?
This is a question that intertwines simplicity and complexity.
Our culture has a significant influence on transforming young males into seemingly fragile men.
The concept of “Adversities breed strong men, strong men cultivate prosperous times, prosperous times nurture frail men, and frail men direct us back to adverse times” from Michael Hopf’s dystopian book “Those Who Remain” is quite notable:
We are living in an era marked by prosperity.
Our fathers and grandfathers paved the way to these prosperous times. They constructed contemporary architectures and urban landscapes, automobiles were their invention, even the internet owes its existence to them — they made every necessity conveniently accessible. And that’s just the tip of the iceberg.
The Baby Boomers and Generation X faced the aftermath of two global wars.
They endured the grim realities of a post-war world, and it was this battle-hardened experience that fortified them.
They undertook the mission of global restoration, a task now shouldered by Millennials.
In an era defined by stalwart men, they drove the world forward, birthing innovative technologies.
The transformation of our times manifests that today’s young men are growing up in an overly pampered environment.
Their every desire is catered to, without resistance.
Prolonged parenting and abundant gratification are the norms of their upbringing.
With easy access to food, no mandatory military duties, a plethora of digital devices like phones, laptops, video games, and unrestricted online adult content at their disposal, they want for nothing.
All their wishes are fulfilled with minimal effort.
Their days are often spent static, either glued to their computer screens immersed in the virtual realm of gaming or engrossed on their smartphones browsing the web.
Their existence rarely intersects with the harsh realities of life.
The trials and tribulations associated with striving for a goal are alien to them.
Their exposure to real-life social scenarios is severely limited.
Divine affection aside, they no longer endure the sting of personal rejection from a woman.
A simple swipe right on a profile is the new norm if they find someone attractive. If the interest isn’t reciprocated by a specific woman, they simply move onto the next.
There’s no first-hand rejection or discomfort.
Such a relaxed western lifestyle, devoid of any rejection, discomfort, or hardship in pursuit of goals, is cultivating a generation of passive young men.
Can the damage be undone? Is restoration possible?
This indeed provokes thought.
Persisting on this path will certainly escalate the situation.
In order to cultivate resilient and self-reliant males, challenging periods must be constructed for them.
But this doesn’t imply depriving them of nourishment or subjecting them to strenuous tasks.
Absolutely not.
The crux of what I’m proposing is the importance of instilling in them the true worth of things.
Let’s guide them to understand that acquiring or achieving anything worthwhile requires effort, enduring discomfort, and sometimes, even pain.
We need to encourage them to step out into the real world and immerse themselves in real-life experiences.
Allow them to navigate conflicts with their peers, experience setbacks, and discover the strength to rise again.
Give them the freedom to interact with the opposite sex, face rejection, and overcome the disappointment it brings.
Promote face-to-face social engagement to dispel their inherent fears and boost their confidence.
Teachers should be permitted to grade them fairly, reinforcing the message that good results are earned through hard work, not by parental influence.
We owe it to them to expose them to life’s realities as they truly are.
